I can’t seem to get myself on a solid system.
I know how terrible it feels to be sleepy – we all know that feeling. Your eyelids feel swollen, dry, and heavy. Your brain has a numbing weight pressing against it, daring you to just rest your eyes a moment. Next thing you know, your mouth is wide open while your head lolls back in class. I know how terrible it feels to be sleepy. And yet, I keep depriving myself of it.
I don’t understand the phenomenon in which Narcolepsy includes some Insomnia, but I know it’s real. Not only do we not get sufficient deep sleep, but (at least for me) I just can’t bring myself to get in bed and relax at a decent hour. Some of it stems from the fact that school stress causes me to freeze up and not accomplish anything (so I stay up late reluctantly finishing homework), but the other reasons are unknown to me.
Taking medication that forces me to fall asleep isn’t an option either. Every case and body is different, and if I take my medication for too many days at a time, my overall anxiety increases and my brain feels fuzzy.
This is my current struggle. I’m sorry I haven’t been posting anything in the past months — I hope whoever’s reading this has a wonderful day.